LEADERSHIP – Connecting with people

A medical intern was given a pop-quiz, consisting of 20 questions, by one of his professors.  Finishing the first 19 questions easily, he felt proud of himself – that is until he got to the 20th question! This question asked,” What is the name of the person who sweeps the halls of this building?”

Needless to say, the young intern was flabbergasted. Surely this had nothing to do with him being able to be a doctor? Having moved from feeling proud to feeling somewhat insulted, he approached the professor and asked “Surely this question doesn’t count? 

“Yes, it does count.” was the reply. “In life you need to pay attention to people.  Everyone you come into contact with is important.  Regardless of whether they can advance you in your career or not, they are important.  By paying attention to them, you validate them as a person.  As a physician this will be a very important thing for you to know.  Don’t ignore anyone.  A simple hello can make a big difference.”

After that conversation, the young intern went out of his way to talk to the cleaning lady. They developed a friendship because he took the time to pay attention to her.  At the same time, it made her day, as this would-be doctor remembered her name and took time out to talk to her. She was important!

What is important?

Some leaders think that connecting with people is only necessary when there is a clear business purpose, for example during staff meetings. But ask yourself, when a stranger gets up to talk, how do you know you can trust what they say? How do you know whether you should take their advice or accept their proposal if you don’t know them?

On the other hand, if you know the person, are you not in a better position to judge as to whether to trust them and take their advice? Isn’t it logical therefore that to get the most out of people, you need to take the time to get to know them. You also need to show them that you genuinely care about them and that they can trust you.  Unfortunately, many so-called leaders do not understand this. 

Trust Bank

The ability to foster trust within an organization is a crucial leadership skill. Warren Bennis stated that, “Leadership without mutual trust is a contradiction in terms.” In other words, you cannot be an effective leader without trust and without an investment in trust, people are less likely to connect with you. When people have confidence in your credibility, the foundation of the way you are trusted, they will be more willing to forgive you when you make mistakes or ‘have a bad day’.

Steven Covey suggests 13 ways of making deposits into this trust account:

1. Talk Straight
2. Demonstrate Respect
3. Create Transparency
4. Right Wrongs
5. Show loyalty
6. Deliver results
7. Get better
8. Confront reality
9. Clarify expectations
10. Practise accountability
11. Listen first
12. Keep Commitments
13. Extend Trust

That is why taking time to get to know and understand people is probably the most fruitful investment a leader can make.

By the same token however, you also need to understand yourself – your strengths and more particularly, your weaknesses and how other people perceive you. This will help you to build on your strengths and work on your weaknesses.

When you understand yourself and the other person, you are in a better position to modify your style and behaviour to the person and the situation, so that you can really connect with them.

Raymond Ackerman was famous for this; taking time each day to personally greet his staff and speak to them individually. In one interview he stated:

“The best way to receive is to give. One can be tough minded, but not hard-hearted. I believe in trying to help everyone but it is also good for my company to fight for people”

Hilary Hilton ‘Zag’ Ziglar, the American author and motivational speaker, put forward that you can have everything you want in life if you will just help others get what they want. The only way to know what they want is to get to know them!

Real leaders know the greatest potential for growth of a company is through growth of its people.  It has been shown through studies that

• The average executive spends 75% of his or her day working with people;

• The largest single cost in business is people;

• The largest most valuable asset to any company is people; and

• All plans and objectives towards achieving the vision, mission and goals of an organization happen through people.

Connecting with people

Therefore, it is the responsibility of leaders to take the first step and make the effort to build relationships.  Not that it is easy, but it’s vital for the success of any organization. When a leader connects with his or her people, you can see it in the way the organization functions.  Loyalty and a strong work ethic filters through the organization and the vision of the leader becomes the inspiring force that drives people to achieve

Get to know everyone you work with right down to the cleaning lady. Know their names, take time to say hello and have a brief chat. This will cost you nothing but will make a big difference to how people perceive you.